Easing Into Your New Career/Life Path

I LOVE love, her writing-her name is Tama Kieves, This Time I Dance :  Creating the Work You Love is her book.    And since I find her so inspiring, I thought that you my readers may also resonate with her words. They also always seem to come at just the right moment.  As Transition is so much of what I live, write and think  about it’s that transition from the know to the unknown (career/love/creative expression.)  That could be the known to the Unknown too.

Between Worlds: 3 Steps to Turn Transition into Your True Life

“Surviving meant being born over and over again.” Erica Jong

Freedom is not just about being able to choose anything you want. Freedom is ease with oneself. Believe me, you know this, when you’re in a transition faced with goblins, jewels, and choices. See, the problem isn’t that you don’t know yet which life you want. The real problem is that voice in your head—which is just way too much like a jumpy crack junkie, or, say, a cattle-prodding “concerned” relative, who needs you to get a fix in the park—rather than take a walk in it.  This junkie is calling out the inner militia to make you DO something. But here’s what you are doing: You are learning to trust yourself, your life and your spirit. You are learning the art of living a more inspired life.

Between the worlds often requires that we hang out on the perimeter, before diving in. Of course, you may look around at others, thinking they’re so “productive.” But what are they getting done? Another day at the office swallowing yawns, truth, and boredom and spending the bulk of their week with people they don’t admire or cherish. What do you think will matter to you at the end of your life? Will it be that you attended another business meeting or swept another floor? Or will it be that you took the time to be with your own heart beating and that you created a life that swept all doubts away? Learning how to trust your deepest desires and yourself are among the most important things you can do with your breaths on earth.

Why Transition Can Unsettle Us

I don’t know about you, but for most of my early years, I led a paint-by-number life, granted the deluxe corporate lawyer edition. I pleased teachers and scored top grades. Good grades got me into a good law school. The great law school got me a great job. I did well at the great job and got the bonus. I was a superior rat. I always knew the lever to press to get the cheese. I didn’t have to have an opinion or instinct or emotional connection. I could accomplish whatever I was told. Of course, I had no idea what to do, if I wasn’t told. I’d never listened to myself.

You may think effort is difficult. But let me tell you effortlessness is way harder.

Living your calling is a path of effortlessness. It’s a path of walking headlong into grace. It doesn’t have an external program or drill sergeant. This kind of reinvention is all about listening to the angels instead of the crowd. It’s about becoming the authority of your destiny. It’s about listening, breath by breath, to wisdom and kindness and discovering that being your own true nature is a direction in and of itself.

Change will change you, and that’s the point. Still, it’s not fun to be between worlds, jobs, lovers, or identities. The good news is I’m here to tell you don’t need to eat yourself into two new pant’s sizes. I’d like to help you navigate this sacred dimension. This is a time out of ordinary time. That means it’s extraordinary time. And I recommend you make extraordinary choices. Here’s three I recommend.

1. Stay the Course

Being between worlds can be expansive and disorienting. Give yourself the opportunity to fly. “I’m thinking of going back to school,” says “Mary” a client of mine. “Of course you are,” I think, grin, and say. Most people want to jump on a track again instead of stay in the intractable pudding of being with themselves and the gloppy unknown.  They want to go back to school, get certified in something, marry the T.V. repairman or anyone else who can come up with a picture at this point, or micromanage someone else’s life. But I don’t recommend pasting a patch over a volcano. There is a birth in progress and I want you to trust the rumbles and discomfort.  Besides, the Universe, in its infinite Universe wisdom, wants to be sure you have lungs and feet before it sends you down a path. Have patience for the mystery of creation.

There’s a reason your full blown path doesn’t just materialize. The mystic poet Emily Dickinson said, “The truth must dazzle gradually or every man be blind.”  And Anais Nin wrote, “There are very few human beings who receive the truth, complete and staggering, by instant illumination. Most of them acquire it fragment by fragment… by successive developments, cellularly, like a…mosaic.” I thought you might believe it more if other people said it.

Remember, an architect doesn’t attach the expensive Spanish windows or frame the structure of a castle until the foundation is secure. You are establishing foundation, scraping through dirt and finally laying concrete. And if it’s taking time, it’s because you keep questioning the foreman and holding up the shovels.

You can ease your anxiety if you strengthen your commitment to a spiritual path, religion, meditation practice or some way of uncovering your own inner voice. When clients or students feel frustrated about not having clear plans, I soothe them, “You don’t need a map, when you have a guide.” I want you to experience a nonlinear source of strength, comfort, and clarity. You will make more progress by choosing from strength instead of fear….

Part 2 tomorrow! Share your comments today! I’d love to hear.

Tama

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